A Curious Collection of the Musings of One Jeremy Wise

Imagine it’s early in the morning after another long day and too short a night.  Imagine, now, that you are startled back into the land of the awake… by the screaming of cats.  Unfortunately, with many strays in our neighborhood, it’s a rather common occurrence.

But today was not so rather common.  Imagine now that the screaming you hear is accompanied by tumbling in the next room.  Imagine that the wrestling mat is not, as you suppose, your back yard, but is in fact your kitchen.

How I wish I were in the country.  How I wish that I could finish the work my cat began… he has claws, I have a Mossberg 500.  But, good ol’ Greenville.  They won’t do anything about the cats, and they won’t allow you to do anything.  If the cat were a person, I now have B&E against him.  But he’s not, and no court in the world will prosecute a feline.  Somehow, this thing has more rights than me.

The only bright moment of the morning was that we found several clumps of fur strewn around the kitchen.  My cat had no more than a small scratch on his face.  That means Newton, vicious thing that he is, kicked some kittie be-hind before high-tailing it to the basement.  Go kid…

Now we sit back and hope he doesn’t have rabies :)

My wife and I decided to finally give the “pet” thing a try, and we got a new kitten from some friends. So far we’ve learned that cats love to chew on things, especially man-flesh! On the outside he looks all cute and innocent. On the inside, though, he’s full of character. Lesson #1: Cats aren’t nearly as easy to discipline as dogs.

The cat’s name is Newton, obviously in honor of one Sir Isaac Newton. Leave it to two science majors to come up with a name like that. His name somewhat resembles Nermal, the cute furball that Garfield so despises, but I’m sure someday Newton will be more like Garfield. Time will tell.